Our lives are always moving in the direction of our strongest thoughts. The Bible says in Mathew 12:34: “Out of the abundance of our heart the mouth speaks.” Therefore, what we think shapes who we are in the heart, mind, and soul. You might read that — and think I am being an overly dramatic or perhaps your saying; coach is using hyperbole to get your attention but this isn’t some exaggeration. Our lives do follow the direction of our thoughts. And there is no script for life. The only manual for life’s journey is found in text messages and not the actual text messages we often think of today.
I have come to believe there is a battle; a struggle for the cultivation of attention. A battle and struggle for awareness too! Of course, I genuinely believe humanity has the innate capacity to develop its responsibility and the capacity for quality of attentiveness toward heartfelt and mindful thoughts that are worthy of actionable attention. However, that innate capacity for humanity to take those responsibilities seriously are gradually in decline. Three factors here: 1) lack of self-awareness. 2) lack of self-control. 3) lack of self-improvement. How the heck would I know? It is quite possible and simple, educated yourself. In fact, if you know more about people you’ll have more success in yourself and your business and spend sometime observing humanity.
Look. . . I am certain and I am sure many of us can agree on one specific thing. Life can be unpredictable, and sometimes it throws us unexpected challenges (battles) or circumstances (struggles) that can be difficult to navigate. And there is no script for life mentioned herein! While some people seem to thrive during hard times, others struggle in the battle to keep their heads above water. Those struggles or battles are natural disasters of habits or learned behaviors. These habits are generated by five factors: parental guidance, inner voices, enacting behaviors; environmental factors, and our own beliefs.
So, what sets these groups apart? Is it their mindset, their upbringing, or their social support network? It is an outer view of themselves?
Here’s what sets those groups apart from the rest of the attention grabbers on this planet. Here is the mindset of the legendary people whose names are more then I have time to mention today.
A) Resilience:
Whether you’re facing a global, professional, or personal crisis — or a mix of both — building resilience can help you cope with stress, and anxiety, overcome adversity, and enjoy the better days to come. Resilience is the ability to bounce back from adversity. Some people have a natural resilience that allows them to recover quickly from setbacks, while others may need to work at developing this skill. Especially, kids today!! Resilient individuals tend to have a positive outlook on life. I like to call it a positive mental attitude (PMA) and those individuals see challenges as opportunities for growth. Another name for this is called “Growth Mindset,” coined phrase by Dr. Carol Dweck.
If you’re more sensitive to emotional distress or feelings over principles. An individual will find it difficult to cope with hardship (struggles) or adversity (battles), it’s important not to think of it as some kind of permanent flaw. Resilience isn’t a macho quality and it isn’t fixed; it’s an ongoing process that requires effort to build and maintain over time. Unless you’ve faced adversity in your life before, it’s unlikely you’ve had the need or opportunity to develop resilience. Drawing on past personal experiences one can help you cope with the challenges you’re facing today.
B) Emotional Intelligence:
Emotional intelligence is essential to one's ability to discern, decipher, exhibit, regulate, and make use of emotions. Why? Because it helps one communicate with others in clear, valuable, and transparent ways. Not only is it important to be able to control your emotions and express them in an ethical, logical, rational, mature, and constructive way, but it’s also essential to recognize, translate, and react to the emotions of others positively and healthily as well. How did I learn this lesson on emotional intelligence? By Jean M. Twenge Ph.D. and Dr. Daniel Goleman. Dr. Goleman science journalist. He arrived at this concept with the use of research by psychologists John Mayer at the University of New Hampshire and Peter Salovey at the University of Yale.
The clergy of emotional intelligence is the ability to recognize and self-manage your own emotions and those of others. People who have high emotional intelligence can stay calm and focused during difficult situations and can empathize with others. They can also communicate effectively, which is critical during hard times (struggles).
C) Flexibility:
Flexibility is another crucial factor in thriving during hard times (struggles or battles). I know many of you reading this will equate flexibility with human exercise — Such as stretching or activities such as yoga which do help with relaxation and also improve balance. But what about the flexibility of emotions? People that learn the skill of flexibility are people who can adapt to changing circumstances and find new solutions when old ones no longer work. They don't get stuck in rigid ways of thinking and are open to new ideas and approaches.
A former principal gave me a book called, “One Word”, by Jon Gordon. It is a quick, easy-to-read little book that provides each reader with the WHY you should have a word and how to create the One Word that will change your life. What I’m trying to say; this book was well-written with principles that can impact anyone personally and professionally. I remember getting the book and pledging to read it back in 2021 — it was awesomely satisfying. My one word was FLEXIBILITY. And each year since — I have found myself adopting a new word.
What I mentioned herein is risky and it is not to impress you, but to press upon you! Many of those tools/ lessons here have helped in my personal and professional experience. But not as much as this ultimately 2,500-year-old exercise. What is it you ask? The exercise of gratitude. The Stoics of old asserted that learning to appreciate what you have would allow any individual or group to enjoy the world, in a much more profound way. Over ten years now, I have read 20 - 50 different studies, and articles on overcoming struggles and challenges. It was a good attitude, enthusiasm, optimism, and charisma that helped individuals and organizations to achieve more authentic success. Is that the script for a healing journey? I don’t know for sure, but it’s worth looking into it and experimenting on yourself. Struggles, battles, challenges; circumstances, situations, moments, and events will always arise at some point during our journey. How we face them is a different story though. Jim Rohn said it best: “Learn how to work harder on yourself than you do your job.” That’s the simple truth and philosophy that changed my my life forever at the age of 30.
In the end, many of you might not agree with my perspectives, methods, training, or my forementioned pursuit of learning. And that’s quite all right! I made a promise and I intend to make it through till the end — If God Almighty permits me too!!
The More You Know…
The More You Know… THE MORE YOU GROW!
Learn everything. Earn everything and make it a masterpiece!!
With gratitude,
Coach Frank Sagasta
(C) @coachfranksagasta 2023
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